Slaughter a cow, will ya?

Fahim went to the beef stall before coming home for lunch. When we do our shopping, it’s usually a bit of a strain to bring things home, and since he drives his motorbike to work, it’s no big deal for him to buy some on his way home and carry it on his handle bars. Many people do this here.

So. He arrives with a bag, and I ask. Beef, darling, he says as he hands me the bag. 3 1/4 kilos today. More than we usually buy, if you count two previous times as a pattern. It’s up to me, of course, to slaughter the thing and portion it out. That’s my job for this afternoon. That and picking all the dirt and bugs off of it. But like I said in a previous blog, that’s Sri Lanka.

After that, I plan on working on my plotting for Black Light, the novel. It’s gonna be pretty spiffy. And I’m gonna sell the screenplay some day for oh, at least a quarter mil, and it’s gonna be a huge box office success. Yup. And you all can say, "I knew her when . . ."

Have I mentioned that this sofa is way way way way way way way way way more comfortable to sit on than the floor? Yup. Decent back support. Not great for napping. Oh well. Can’t have everything. Or can I?

Yeah, okay, no more procrastinating. Time to slaughter that cow.


I’m back, and it took me an hour and forty five minutes to slaughter 3 1/4 kilos of cow. The dirt and grit that’s imbedded into the outer surface is embedded so deeply that the only way to remove most of it is to remove the surface it’s embedded in. Luckily, it’s mostly fatty tissue, so I’m not losing anything important. Plus there are a lot of tendons (as opposed to ligaments which, as I mentioned before, I always get confused. Anyone here who knows the difference, please feel free to enlighten us all in the comments.) I did, however, finally figure out a (relatively) easy way to remove the tendons. But I doubt I’d be capable of explaining it now. If you really want to know, take a butchering class, like I should have before I came over. Chickens and other fowl – easy. But, well, I could have used some tendon removing tips. Or I could do a video. But really, that’s getting into a fairly involved process, and honestly, who among you actually wants to know?


. . .


I thought so.

Author: LMAshton
Howdy! I'm a beginner artist, hobbyist photographer, kitchen witch, wanderer by nature, and hermit introvert. This is my blog feed. You can find my fediverse posts at

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